Matsvin

It was a bright spring morning when I first saw her. A light breeze was blowing across my face. The sky was overcast. It was as though the clouds fell so much in love with the sun, they were not letting him out and the sun was so constrained by their love that every few minutes he was trying to come out, only to be caught by the love of the clouds again. The breeze was caressing my face and my hair was trying to catch the breeze blowing across my face in its myriad strands and each time the breeze won. The birds were happy to see the daylight and showed their delight by singing and dancing in the air. The world was a lovely place , nature was making it even more lovely and with the ushering in of the spring it felt as if this is how heaven is.

I was walking along a deserted street, lonely by myself, at peace with the world when it happened. A lightning flashed across. It was as though a thousand suns had burst open in utter delight , eager to show their celestial powers.I looked at her, stunned by her beauty, stood staring at her. She was running towards me, playing catch up with her friends. The
breeze was blowing from behind her , swaying her hair as she ran. Her dress wanted to accompany the breeze and tried to get away , but her body clung to them, not wishing to let go of their warmth. Her smile revealed a set of perfectly white teeth. The light gray eyes sparkled with life , as though an ocean was running inside those eyes, reflecting the light
rays that fell on them and I got completely lost in them. The moist red lips , burst open with a smile and I was not going to look at anything else or anyone else as long as this angel was in front of me.

An year went by , a century flew past me and I lost track of the millenniums that ran by. Time seemed to stand still. Everything seemed to have stopped. My heart started beating faster , silence around me only made their beat sound more clearly , or is it that I was hearing her heart beat ?. Suddenly the world became a different place all together. The gentle breeze became a tornado , it was sucking everything in its devastating path and all of a sudden both of us were sucked into it. As I was going round and round in circles inside the tornado , I saw a thousand gold fishes swimming around me. This couldn't be true. How can fishes swim inside tornado?. Then immediately I realized , they were not fishes , but indeed her eyes.

Suddenly the tornado stopped. Where was I ?. I seemed lost. Lost in the oceans of her eyes. A thousand tornados blew in them , catching me every second and throwing me off guard. Her fair white skin only accentuated her already heavenly beauty. If there was a beauty , here it stood in front of me personified. She stopped in front me for a few seconds. Our eyes met. I was drawn into them. No gravitational force on earth could have pulled me back from them. She smiled turned back to take a look at her friends and started running again. Her hair blew across my face and fragrance in her hair made me faint. She is not a human. She is a celestial beauty , living incognito in this world.

She ran inside her house and in a flash was out of my sight. I woke up from my slumber with a shock. It was as if somebody shook me up. Is this called love?. I had heard that love makes you crazy , lose your mind , but I had lost myself. In just a few seconds (time had apparently not waited for me) she swept past me stealing my heart on her way. I was happy and sad at the same time. Happy that I saw her and sad that I was no longer seeing her. My heart was beating at a break neck speed. I started running after her. Suddenly she was the only thing I ever wanted in life. It was as if she was holding my life in her hands and I had to redeem it at any cost. My legs felt a sudden surge on energy. A new life had sprung up inside me and leaped in the air in joy.

I ran inside her house and stood stunned in the hallway. There was a picture of hers with a garland around it. I looked around. I couldn't find her. I went back to the door and looked out. Her friends were not there. I came back to the photo and stood staring at it.

"Are you a friend of her ?". An elderly voice spoke.

I turned around and saw a middle aged woman standing behind me.

I just nodded my head.

"She just died in her sleep. Nobody knew what happened." , tears rolling down her eyes.

I did not know what to say. What was it that I just saw ?. Was it an apparition ?. But it looked so true.

I consoled her mother and slowly walked out , not knowing what to do , where to go. The gap between reality and sublimity had disappeared. I did not know what was true and what was not. I just slowly walked away.

© 2000-2008 Vinodh Dorairajan, All Rights Reserved.